Belt America

Ladies and Gentleman over the last decade a great error has occurred in the fashion world. It would appear that the mass manufacture of belts has ceased to exist. This crisis seems to be in both the men's and women's clothing departments. The belt is a lovely accesory worn around the waist of pants and some skirts. I would urge the garment industry to please, please, please bring back the belt designed to go inside the belt loops in order to stop the unsightliness of thongs and boxers.

Once these belts are back I would appreciate it greatly if people would wear them. I mean Appropriately wear them. This means introduce the waist of your pants to the waist on your body. Insert the belt into the belt loops and then cinch the belt so that it keeps the pants up and at waist level. If you are unfamiliar with your waist, that is the area right under, right on or right above your belly button. Pick a place that will cover your underwear and belt it there.

Gentlemen, I am very tired of looking at your under garments. If I don't know you on an intimate level then I should not be that familiar with your underthings. Let's face it NO ONE looks good with their pants hanging down (except possibly Marky Mark but only in his poster). This fad was awful from the onset and based on prisoners being unable to wear belts. Why are we accepting and in some cases encouraging this trend? You look stupid riding your skateboards holding up baggy pants so they stay out of your way. You look stupid trying to walk down the street and hold your pants up at the same time. You look stupid walking with over sized pants belted under your butt to keep them up. You just look stupid.

Ladies, your thong does not turn me on. Chances are the man you are attracting because you have taken to heart the silliness of "The Crack is the new Cleavage" is Not the man you want.
If you don't have a full length mirror to show you what the thong actually looks like hanging over the top of your pants I would suggest investing in one. It's a string that cuts off your flesh. Even you ladies with super sexy bodies aren't exempt from the flesh roll above the string on your thong (although you do have a great deal less flesh). After we get the flesh roll we see a random tiny patch of cloth. It's just sitting there. It looks ridiculous. It makes you look cheap and tacky. When you squat or sit we then get to see your crack (oh joy). My friend feels that you are fair game to have things thrown into that crack cleavage. Beware, she has great aim.

Ladies and Gentlemen Please stop subjecting us to what lies beneath your clothes. Underwear means to wear under something. Let's go back to that definition. The time to pull up your pants is now.