How to use Bully appropriately

bul·ly/ˈbo͝olē/

Noun:	A person who uses strength or power to harm or intimidate those who are weaker. Corned beef.
Verb:	Use superior strength or influence to intimidate (someone), typically to force him or her to do what one wants. Exclamation: An expression of admiration or approval

You can't surf the net, turn on the television or read a paper without finding an article about bullying these days. Apparently our society has run rampant with bullies over the last 5 years. Unfortunately I feel our society has actually run rampant with a poor interpretation of what an actual bully is as everyone thinks the world runs just for them these days and any obstacle in  the way was intentionally placed there. I regret to inform you that not everyone is being bullied.

My mother told me that if I started any physical altercations I would be punished. She also told me to stand up for myself using words and wisdom but if that failed do to the other individual starting something physical then make sure they NEVER want to try that action again. I personally feel that was the best advice for me, my area, the time period and the neighborhood in which I lived. Every parent will have different advice and times have changed but one thing hasn't, at some point in time each of us will have to be responsible for making our presence appreciated. We are not doormats. The are those who do not clearly comprehend this and will try to walk all over you. Some of these individuals are simply ignorant;some arrogant;some obnoxious; some mean and others will actually be bullies.

On a daily basis we encounter individuals who are just mean spirited. They aren't going out of their way to pick on anyone in particular as they are just mean in general. When we encounter these people, they tend to rub us the wrong way as they don't make us feel our best. These individuals are not bullies and these individuals, believe it or not, are actually in child form. Children are not all sweet adorable beings. We tend to form the majority of our personality at a young age and guess what, mean people were kids too. Not only were the mean kids but the ignorant, the arrogant and the obnoxious as well.These people are a complete and utter pain but not necessarily bullies.A bully goes out of his or her way to target a specific individual to torment repeatedly. That is when we have a real bullying problem. When this occurs is when we need to deal with this person and resolve it. We have to teach children the difference. We have to teach parents the difference. We have to work to solve the problems and give kids coping mechanisms rather than just label everyone bullies and place blame all over.

There is no reason this entire nonsense of cyber bullying should even exist. WHY is your underage child on the internet? If adults can barely exist online without becoming completely idiotic, how do you expect children without fully developed social skills to know how to act online? It amazes me how many talk shows and news segments have been dedicated to this topic. The internet is a cold and impersonal place where people feel free to shame others since the others aren't there. IT is so easy to type a hurtful comment without judgement. The eyes of your victim are not there to stare at you. The sounds of the others aren't there to give you pause. Type and hit send; then sit back and grin. Get your child off the internet. They do NOT have to be there. Problem on cyber bullying solved.

 Today's parents and children bandy the word Bully about as if it's no big deal. They are wrong. The stigma of being labeled a bully can last a lifetime. Teach your child how to use words as tools of personal defense. Teach your child how to know the difference between a bully and a brat. Take your child off the internet. Once we return to parenting and letting your child know that not all situations are fair but that's life and life is not fair then maybe we can all say, "Bully for you!"